I Have Found the Tree of Life

Citizens of Earth, do not be alarmed. I have found the fruit of the gods.

It is delicious. It is mild. It is sweet. It is square, and comes in smallish boxes, and it’s on sale 6 for $10 at LoLo’s. Free gallon of milk with purchase.

Yes, ladies and gentlemen, I can eat Golden Grahams. With little fear of retribution or vomiting, I can eat Golden Grahams. Oh, happy day.

And I hate to say this – because I am very excited to be pregnant, and I’m thrilled to have a baby on the way, and I can’t wait to be a mom, and I know Ethan’s so excited to be a dad, and we’re just so stoked to be the world’s weirdest parents – so I hate to say this, but after all you’ve put me through, you toxic little Gummy Bear of a baby… take that! Kabam! It is about time you let me eat something! I didn’t anticipate disagreeing this frequently with a child until at least the tweenage years.

I digress. Point is, Golden Grahams are fantastic, I’m holding down food, and I’m on considerably better terms with the baby inside me than I was last night. Take that, universe. ♦


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